Not Me Monday

(did not...read: might have, probably...most certainly did. "Not me"...read: ok, so it was.)

*I did not leave Eli alone to devour a croissant for lunch while I did not sit and play on Facebook. I did not clue into the fact that criossants are very crumbly, and I most definitely did not proceed to vacuum my hooverphobic child to clean him off after he rubbed the entire crumbly mess all over. It was not me who vacuumed his hair, face, shirt, pants and bum. I did not ignore his hooverphobic screams. NOT ME!

*It was not me who sprayed my child's pants (while wearing), with Febreeze after I changed his dirty diaper yet the stench still lingered in the fabric. It was not me whom was too lazy to just put on a new pair of pants. NOT ME!

*I most definitely did not eat ALL of my sons special bag of Halloween treats from the YMCA's childcare ladies on the drive home from the gym. It was not me who told him they were 'Yucky' while he ate his organic energy bar. NOT ME!!